This, being cancer.
I guess it is that time again, where life is on hold again, where nothing is for granted, again.
This time, the Queen went all in : Stage 4 Colon Cancer.
Even reading this right now, reading these words I just typed, feels unreal. Hopefully, that will help in my healing, because yes, the Queen has no plans to die from this. So, these blogs will not be about how I slowly perish and become bald, it will be about how the Queen wages war on this unwanted visitor of her life.
Quick recap :
Early January, follow up colonoscopy 6 months after the last. Immediate report of a new focus of unwanted growths. Then biopsy results came in. Not only it is cancer, but it is a bad one, a nasty one. One of those where the prognosis for survival are in the single digits.
Doctors were informed : Dr Nissenblatt (my good old oncologist from Breast Cancer times) and Dr Saeed (gastroenterology oncology surgeon).
Both doctors were extremely somber and worried. No amount of Queen reassurance could reach them, the Queen was in trouble.
Then Pet Scan , that showed absolutely nothing (not even the cancer itself) , but the Queen was informed this is a cancer who likes to "hide" from imaging.
Then exploratory surgery, that showed cancer lesions "all over" outside of the colon, and that granted my cancer the title of Stage 4.
Jarvis!
So let me introduce you to my new foe : Jarvis, Stage 4 colon cancer, at your service!
Why Jarvis? I was just looking for an ugly name.
Jarvis and the Queen are going to have to come to some understanding, where he gently goes into indefinite remission.
(Who gets the mask thing? )
How do we do this?
Hopefully , this is not going to be one of those blog posts that people read post-mortem and think "poor thing, she really meant it".
I do mean it, and I think it is the first step towards recovery.
There will be no pity party here (or anywhere else for that matter) but there will be a lot of talk about treatments, legitimate ones and more frowned upon ones.
And as last time, like for this breast cancer journal I wrote ten years ago and became a theater play, there will be mostly dark humor, self-derision, and truth.
Some truth
Am I scared? Not really.
Am I in denial? No, I deny being in denial.
Do I feel pain? None, I feel wonderful and healthy.
Did I want this? Absolutely not. But it is here now and Jarvis does not yet know one thing: the Queen is invincible.
The plan
Anti-cancer diet, with a million supplements
Vitamin C Intravenously, twice a week
Ozone therapy twice a week
Hyperbaric chamber twice a week
THC oil every night (the high you get is just a bonus, the rest is immune system healing)
Ivermectin & Fenbendazole (right out of Mel Gibson playbook lol )
Mistletoe therapy (to be started this week)
Methylene Blue daily (beautiful blue, by the way)
Positive thinking
Exercise
The above is the hippy stuff, the stuff that would surely make Dr Nissenblatt roll his eyes if I decide to tell him about it.
The non-hippy stuff :
The HIPEC surgery (Seeing the surgeon on Feb 26th)
Radiations? (hopefully none of that)
Regular chemotherapy? (hopefully none of that)
Welcome to my healing journey, where we will defy the odds, challenge the stats, and get healthy for real.
🎢Je te sais capable ma soeur cherie, capable de vaincre, de pietiner , de pulveriser ce... Jarvis! Oh oui je te sais capable! on est avec toi, on peut pas faire grand chose a part suivre cette epreuve en te lisant et priant tres tres tres tres tres fort pour que bientot tu sois a nouveau en parfaite sante, je t'aime.
I’m with you Queen, thanks for the update. Standing by to stand by. Continuing to send indigo waves of light as needed. Also available for wine infusions.